Highlights of the Podcast:
00:18 – The Entitlement Attitude
00:53 – Mark’s client
02:38 – Consistent is the word
03:03 – People don’t really know what results they should get
05:16 – This attitude is more common in men
06:10 – People have unrealistic expectations about how easy it should be
06:44 – They say it’s the generation
07:25 – It’s a day-to-day consistency
07:44 – You’re not entitled to the results you want without putting effort into it
08:11 – You must have the right mindset
Transcript:
Mark: Hi! This is Mark and Stephen from TheDVCC.com with another new episode of the The DoubleVision Conditioning Centre podcast. Hello! I’m Mark and…
Stephen: Hello! I’m Stephen.
Mark: So, today, we wanted to first wish you well. We hope you’re well. But we wanted to speak about a theme that we’ve noted over the years, but as it relates to weight loss. And it kind of can be talked about in lots of different aspects of life, I guess, but we’re obviously going to particularly attribute it or put it towards weight loss and how it affects people with weight loss, and that is an entitlement attitude.
Stephen: And you’ve probably read about this in the papers, actually. I think they apply this a lot to young people nowadays, but I think it’s actually just a running theme overall and it really does apply to weight loss as well. We’re going to try and put it into context. I think you’ve got a little story, haven’t you, Mark?
Mark: I have got a little story. It kind of actually triggered me into wanting to do this podcast and it’s basically an interaction I had. I mean, it was a fair few years ago now. It was an interaction I had with a chap I used to train. I mean, he was very successful. He was a businessman and he owned his own business. He made millions and was very successful in that business. And when he came to come training with me, he basically felt he was entitled to results, I guess, and he was after – I think it was a couple of weeks – he was inquiring why. He thought, “Why am I not looking more like I want to look? Why have I not lost the weight? I want to put on the muscle I wanted to put on.”
Stephen: Was he putting in the effort or…
Mark: Well, that’s the thing. He was putting an effort in his sessions because obviously, he was being trained. But it was he felt he was entitled to better results. Like I asked him, I simply said to him, “Okay. So how long have you been working hard at your business?” He did work very, very hard and that’s why he was very successful. “But how long have you done it?” And he was like, “Oh God! Years! Literally, 15, 20 years.” “So okay. So do you think that you would’ve made those millions or you were entitled to those millions after a couple of years of work?” He said, “Oh no, no. No chance! Like I hadn’t put the effort in. I didn’t know what I needed to know. I hadn’t created the habits.”
Stephen: And haven’t done it consistently, right?
Mark: Exactly. “I haven’t done it consistently to have got the results that I have now.” And I was like, “Okay. So let’s attribute that to your health goals, your weight loss goals that you want.” And you could see him realize then that he hadn’t put the work in, the hard work in…
Stephen: Consistent is the word.
Mark: Consistently to get the results that he felt he was entitled to. And you could see it dawned on him that he’s not entitled to it because he hasn’t created the habits. He hasn’t put the effort in with his nutrition, with his exercise for a long enough period of time to get those results.
Stephen: Yeah, and I think that’s what it is. And I think half the issue is actually the context that people have with weight loss is they don’t really know what results they should get. So whatever result they do get, they always think they should get better.
Mark: I mean, I should go back to that chapter. Actually, we trained together. I think it was 5 years in total and he got really, really good results.
Stephen: But not overnight, right?
Mark: Oh no, no. No. I mean, it took him a while for him to be happy with the way he was because obviously, he’d neglected his health for all that time he was building his business. And that was another realization that he had, just on a side note, that he didn’t need to, to build the business to where it is now or where it was, he didn’t need to not be exercising. I mean, it would have only helped him actually; given him more energy and given him better health to enable him to keep working those long hours and putting in that hard work that he did to build that business. But it was a flip in attitude when he realized that he was feeling like he was entitled to those results just because he had done a couple of weeks of exercise.
Stephen: Yeah. And it’s an interesting thing, isn’t it? Because I’ve come across the same thing with people that have good jobs, are good at their jobs and very, very focused. They know what they’re doing when they’re at work, but they seem to not be able to transfer that same – what’s the word for it?
Mark: Drive?
Stephen: Drive, goal-setting and the realization that they need to work and keep consistently working to progress to their own physical self. So, if something doesn’t seem to happen in a week or two or a month or two, then they kind of give up. Whereas, they wouldn’t dream of doing that same thing at their place of work or in their own business or whatever it is. But they don’t seem to be able to transfer those skills, that mindset, that mental mindset that they’re going to have to work hard, that they’re going to have to carry on consistently to get the result they want to their own bodies and physiques.
Mark: Exactly. And we kind of see this a fair few more times actually now with men. The chaps that want to put on muscle and increase – for guys, it’s pretty much increase their chest and back and their arms. But they often, “Oh, I want to look similar to a guy on Men’s Health or Men’s Fitness, the men’s magazines. I want to look like that.” And I’m like, “Okay. So how long do you think that should take you?” And oftentimes, they say about 6 to 12 months. That would be kind of showing a disservice to those guys in the front covers because that takes years and years of dedication, hard dedication. And for someone to think that it’s just 6 months of training will enable them to look like that is unfortunately untrue, but it’s a bit of a disservice to those chaps. The hard work that’s been put in for them to achieve that.
Stephen: And it’s not to say it’s impossible.
Mark: No, it’s not.
Stephen: It’s just some people have unrealistic, I think, expectations about how easy it should be. And I think the thing is, if it was easy, then everyone would be walking around like they were on the front cover of a men’s magazine. But that’s just using that as an extreme example to try and illustrate the point that that entitlement attitude does extend into when people think that it should just all be easy. They shouldn’t have to work for it. But when you talk about other aspects of life, people expect to have to work for it.
Mark: Yeah. I mean, they do say it’s the generation. I think it’s the generation blow ass that they say they think is entitled to everything. Entitled to money, entitled to a house, entitled to the happy life without actively having to work at it. Like I’ve realized this and I’m sure you have too, Stephen, but also our listeners, that most things that are…
Stephen: Worth having?
Mark: Worth having don’t come easily. You have to work at them. I think that’s part of the enjoyment in them, is that you’ve worked at it and you’ve got the results. So money, a house, happiness, family or whatever. It’s not a walk in the park. It’s not easy. But if it was…
Stephen: And it’s day-to-day consistency.
Mark: Exactly. It’s day-to-day. And you can translate that to everything. So like we say, in work, in health, weight loss, everything, it’s all about the day-to-day consistency, putting in the habits and the hard work that will get you the results.
Stephen: And having that mindset that you’re going to keep consistent, keep going, and realizing that it’s not going to be overnight, that you’re not entitled to getting the result you want unless you really put the effort into it, it makes it a lot easier because it’s when you go into something thinking that it’s going to be easy, you’re not going to have to do anything and it’s just going to happen, that actually, as soon as one little roadblock comes along, you end up giving up anyway. So if you have the right mindset when you’re going into – say, for example, you want to start losing weight seriously and you have the right mindset that no, it’s not going to be that easy. Because to say that it’s easy is just ridiculous. It’s a lie.
Mark: That’s why all of these adverts are kind of annoying when they make it look like you can take a pill or do whatever. Something really simple and you lose weight. Probably you can for the next two weeks, but not for the next 20 years.
Stephen: And not without any sort of side effect in the sense that it can damage you in other ways.
Mark: Exactly.
Stephen: So yeah. So I think as long as you in with the right mindset, it then becomes easy, if you understand what I mean. Because it’s not a big shock to you if it’s not easy.
Mark: Explain that.
Stephen: Well, if you go into looking to lose weight with the right mindset, you’re going to have to work for it. You’re going to have to be consistent. It’s not going to be easy. That makes it actually easier to lose weight.
Mark: Kind of your expectations and things, that’s the whole thing, isn’t it? When someone knows what to expect, they find it a lot easier to handle something.
Stephen: To deal with it.
Mark: To deal with it. And that’s why we always talk about the whole bam effect where if somebody experiences a bereavement or anything significant and negative in their life, they oftentimes stop exercising. But if you tell people that you are going to come across that, when they do, they’re much more able to handle that situation because they are expecting it.
Stephen: Exactly.
Mark: So when you first start exercising, you’re going to be sore. Your muscles are going to be sore and it’s a lot easier to handle that because you know it’s going to happen. So that’s why it’s very important that when you are wanting to lose weight or whatever goal you have, is to realize that it’s going to take some hard work and some changes in your life really. They don’t have to be massive, but you will need to have some changes if you want to achieve something different to perhaps you’ve achieved before. And as long as you understand that, you’re going to be successful.
Stephen: Exactly right.
Mark: So, anyway, that was going to be a quick short one because it was just something that we wanted to put down on a podcast because it’s something we’ve been talking about amongst us or between ourselves. But we’d like to hear your comments on this. Do you or have you ever felt like you were entitled to lose weight, and then you perhaps changed your mindset and you then achieved it, or do you think that yeah, as a generation, we have become more of the entitlement attitude. Whereas perhaps our parents or our grandparents were more used to working hard at whatever they wanted to achieve. Let us know because I’d love to hear your comments and you can put them in the little box below this podcast.
So, as always, this is Mark and Steve from TheDVCC.com.
Stephen: Bye-bye.
